Who of us who believe in God, at
one time or another, hasn’t made the comment, “If I was God, I would (insert some grand change in the world you
would make)”?
Let
me go on record, right here, right now, and say that, if I were God, the world would definitely suck a lot more than it does
now. The reason is that what would seem to make sense to me while I’m designing stuff like, say,
humans, I’d create some interesting problems.
For instance, I wouldn’t have created mankind in a way that would have required us
to go to the bathroom. That sounds all well and good until you realize what a bloated mess the human race
would be. Then, again, have you hung out at the food court in the mall lately? Just
sayin’ . . .
For
another, if I was God, I wouldn’t allow “ugly” to exist. But, then, I’ve been told
that sometimes my idea of “beautiful” isn’t exactly in sync with what the rest of the world defines as “beautiful”.
With that being the case, it’s highly likely the world would be an awfully ugly place if I defined “beauty”
for the rest of the human race.
So,
I’ve come to the conclusion that I should “let” God be God and I’ll keep working on trying to make
me a better me.
That
said, I do, like all of you, have questions that I can’t wait to ask God. Well, actually, I’m
not in a huge hurry to get to Heaven to ask Him my questions but, when I do eventually get there (and I believe
that I will), I’ve got a long list of questions that I want to ask.
As I’ve written before, if my fantasy about Heaven is
anywhere near accurate, then it will be like this: When we get there and we’ve hugged our loved ones
and friends who have beat us there (and stand in total shock about those who was actually allowed to pass through the great
pearly gates), we’ll turn around and see a sign that says, “Line To Ask God Questions Begins Here”.
The purpose would be much like
a Q&A session with William Shatner at a Star Trek convention, where we get to ask for clarification of certain “scenes”
in our show of life.
Questions
like: Why did the Beatles have to break up? Why did You allow disco to be invented? Why didn’t get
spurs for my fourth Christmas? You know? All the important questions of life.
No, actually, the dominant questions
would be ones like: Why is there such evil in the world? Why is there pain and suffering? Why
do horrible things happen to children? Why do the good die young?
Many theologians tell us that
things got all jabberwocky when Adam (or Eve, depending on which sex you want to blame) bit the apple and God’s plan
for mankind bit the dust. From there on, man just came up with more incredible ways to fowl life and history.
After
I recently turned a simple $7 bathroom repair into a several hundred dollar remodel, I can see just how these things can happen.
So, I subscribe to that “garden variety” theology (get it? Garden? Theology? Never mind.)
This week, a girl – an American
citizen – was returned home here in Dallas after being “wrongfully” deported to Columbia. According
to news reports, she was deported after being arrested for shoplifting and giving authorities a fake name, telling them she
was 21 and that she was from Columbia.
Viola! She winds up in Columbia and now the world wants to know how on earth
our big brother government could possibly let this happen?
No, really. They’re seriously asking
that question.
While
there certainly is some room for questioning why our vast and overreaching bureaucracy didn’t do what it was chartered
to do, the kid did, after all, say all the right things to get her to Columbia. In other words, from where
I sit and from what I’ve read, the fault lies in no one else’s lap but the kids. The family
and their attorney don’t think so but it appears as simple as that.
It’s funny that, when we want black and white answers,
when they’re starring us in the face, we refuse to accept them. I know that I’ve certainly been guilty of that.
So, going back to Cosmic Concierge
that I mentioned earlier, yes, I do have a lot of questions that I fully intend to ask God sometime in the (hopefully) distant
future when it’s finally my time. There are some genuine, heartfelt questions that defy “logical”
answers at this time.
However, as time progresses, I’m already learning that many of the things I question that has
happened “wrong” in my life have been of my own making. As that black and white realization hits me, I just say
to myself, “Oh God!”
