Christmas. We’ve
all had a few weeks to reflect on what it really means and on the memories of Christmases past.
I typically rewind back to memories as a kid – of
toys under the try and that mystical, magical wonder of how Santa got into our house or trailer where there wasn’t chimney
for him to come down. (I was so “literal” – even then).
I also reflect on Christmas jokes. One
is a joke told 40 or so years ago by an in-law of my mom’s best friend at the time. It’s about how angels wound
up on top of Christmas trees. It’s a little “raw” to share here but let’s just
say that it involves a bungling, inefficient angel (duh) helping out Santa, who becomes quite angry with her.
You can probably figure out the rest from here.
Another joke that comes to mind was told to me by my boss, the late Steve Donais, when
I worked at his store, Christian Emporium, in Phoenix back in 1981. It went something like this:
A Protestant, a Catholic and a Jew were standing around,
talking about their Christmas traditions. The Protestant said, “On Christmas eve, we go to a candlelight
service at church, come home and read the Christmas Story to the kids and then send them off to bed so that Santa can arrive
with their presents.”
The Catholic pipes
up and says, “We do pretty much the same thing. We go to Christmas Eve mass, come home, read the
Christmas Story, let the kids open one present and then we send them off to bed so that Santa can show up.”
The Protestant and the Catholic turned uncomfortably to
the Jew and said, “Uh, we know you don’t celebrate Christmas so what do you do on Christmas. Their
Jewish friend smiled and said, “After our last customer has left our store, we turn around the ‘Closed’
sign, join hands around the cash register and sing, ‘What
A Friend We Have In Jesus’.”
Over the years, I have shared that joke among Atheists,
Catholics, Jews and Protestants. The Athiests, Catholics, Jews and some Protestants actually got it and
enjoyed a good laugh. Of course, there were the “super spiritual” types (with their orifices
permanently puckered – think Saturday Night Live’s “Church Lady”) who would condemn me to Hades for
daring to tell such a joke.
Of course, I have other
Christmas memories, too: My first “married” Christmas (I bought my wife a vacuum cleaner. It was the only Christmas
I could ever get away with a gift like that) and all the great Christmases we enjoyed with our daughter as she, too, experienced
the mystical, magical wonder of how Santa into our houses or apartments. She now tells us that it really
creeped her out to know that someone could actually get into our home undetected. She just didn’t
like the thought of that.
Why am I saying all
of this stuff? Dunno, ‘cept it’s Christmas and I’ve gotta say sumpin’.
No, actually, the reason why I’m telling you all of
this is that I know that, for a lot of reasons, the Christmas season can be very depressing to a lot of folks.
It’s the total antithesis of what the birth of Christ is all about – all that “Joy To The World”
and “Peace on earth, goodwill towards men” stuff.
Now, you Athiests and Agnostics don’t go and get all puckered because I’m sayin’
the “C” word. People might think you’re the Church Lady or something. I’m
actually making a point here that I think you “A n’ A’s” my appreciate.
I’m not a psychologist or psychiatrist. I’m
just psycho. However, I’ve learned a thing or two about going through depressing times.
One of those things is, if I’m depressed or feeling alone, I reach out in a helpful or friendly way to others.
Somehow, giving out of my own personal need seems to have a reciprocal effect and two people are helped instead of
just one.
Secondly, I’ve
learned to up my game as to being a true friend to others. I’ve got a long way to go in that area but I’ve definitely
been working on it for the last ten years. I’d like to think that I’ve become a better friend
to others as a result.
I
also find that I’m a lot less puckered that way.
